I have had a heart-to-heart with Britney Spears. I have sung drunkenly with Keith Richards. I have lazily twined daisies into the springy pubic hairs of the gameskeeper. I have fed from the blue fingertips of Dr. Hank McCoy. I have meditated long and hard on the carnal possibilities of Stretch Armstrong.
And now, I want to fuck Fred and George Weasley. Together.
I am a great big Harry Potter geek. I have read each book no fewer than four times, and some of them more like six or seven. When I am depressed, which has been often, though of late, rather amazingly, less and less so, I have soothed my fractured self with the calming balm of Hogwartian fantasy. I know the characters well. I have lived with them for endless, looping months at a time. I can tell you the quirks, the likes and dislikes, the relative merits, foibles and faults of them all.
And I love them, love the whole swarming herd, love Harry, love Dumbledore, love Hermione, love Lupin, love Sirius, love them, love them all.
But I don’t want to fuck any of them but the Weasley twins. (Actually, I would totally fuck Sirius. I just wouldn’t fuck Gary Oldman.)
I also have had many liasons with fictional characters- that's why I read in the tub.
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